When I was building this website over the last few days many fears started to pop up. Over and over and over again.
What are people going to think? Will I be judged? Is this picture too much? Do they think what I do is ridiculous? Am I crazy? Am I too spiritual? Am I too into myself? and possibly the most intense one Can I even do these things that I am offering?
You know someone might think it's too much, too spiritual, too crazy and that i can't do it. Maybe even someone who is close to me or someone whom's opinion I value.
"So what!" I repeatedly during this process had to say to myself. Again and again reminding myself it is perfectly fine to do exactly me. To be perfectly imperfect in full on Tamy Love mode. No shame in the game. This is me and this is it! Take it or leave it.
And of course people will judge. But does it matter? Should I go into hiding, because I am afraid of what anyone could think? No! Not anymore. I am tired of not shining my light, of not standing in my power, of not speaking my truth only because someone might be irritated. If i don't do me, then whats the point?!
And by investigating these thoughts closer I realised that, who ever is judging, they are just as conditionned. I had to study sociology to become aware that there is such thing as conditioning. We are all socialised to behave or not to behave a certain way. That was in the year of 2010 and even though it's been such a long time ago, there are still fears with in me. So deeply rooted, that I am afraid of going public with this website. It never seezes to amaze me, how far in this goes. But now I see the progress. Now I see those monsters. And once I look at them closely, I realise they're not monsters. It's my ego, trying to protect me. Trying to keep me from falling off the wagon of conditions. in fear i might fall into side road puddles of criticism, judgment or even worse failure. I see you ego and what you are trying to do. Thank you but that is no longer necessary. You dont have to protect me. Don't worry I wont be hurt. I can be me now. Thank you. I love you. And I now will publish this website.
May everyone judgemental or open hearted, critical or kind know, my mission here on planet earth is to stand in service of healing and along with it, raise the vibration.
NAMASTE, SAT NAM, THANK YOU, MERCI, GRACIAS, DANKE, KHOP KHUN KA, OSEUN.
